Killer hair

I think my hair is trying to kill me.   I have spent the last two years growing it out from a short bob and have never had a knot in my life.   It's the hair on the right side of my head that I'm concerned about.   The left side is my friend.   Every morning after I wash it I blow dry it.  The right side gets huge tangles in it and I spend five minutes trying to brush it out.  The strands hold onto each other for dear life.  I think they are trying out different knots because some days they are easier to undo then others.   There aim is to find a solid, never-to-be-undone knot and when I'm not looking they will wrap themselves around my neck and strangle me.  I hear them whispering.   You'll probably find me lying on the bathroom floor with the dryer in one hand and a brush in the other.    It's creepy.   They're probably reading this right now.....